Jon and I are practically pros at the whole “long-distance-relationship-thing” at this point. In November, we will celebrate our FIVE-year anniversary. Out of those five years, we have only lived in the same city for ONE of them. Spending three months together during quarantine was a real treat for sure, but returning back to our LDR was rough after being under the same roof for so long. I am going to be spending my last year of PT school on clinical rotations, so I will be living with my parents. Realistically, Jon and I probably won’t be living under the same roof again for a few years. We are both trying to live at home with our families for as long as possible to pay down our student loans, and save up for a down payment on a house. We are hoping that this next chunk of long-distance won’t last too long.
If you are also in a long-distance relationship, here are FIVE tips that have helped Jon and I get through our time apart.
1. Plan out reunions in advance
That way, you have something to look forward to (and this is a GAME-CHANGER)! If you don’t know when you will see your partner next, it definitely makes things that much harder. Jon and I have always lived roughly an hour to and hour and a half apart, so we make sure to see each other every weekend, or every other weekend if possible. This definitely makes it easier to get through stressful weeks in PT school; I know at the end of the week I will get to see my best friend!
2. Check in daily, but also have dedicated times for phone calls/FaceTime
You should try to check in at least once a day: whether that is just a text message or a quick phone call. Let your partner know what’s going on! Having dedicated times to talk for longer periods of time is also important though. Set a specific time each week to catch up uninterrupted. Tell them alllllll about your week, and don’t leave out any details!
3. Clear communication and honesty
This is a big one, especially if one or both of you are in some sort of professional school (like me). When it is going to be a busy week, I make sure to let Jon know what I have going on. Thankfully, he understands and gives me space to study and get things done. He even motivates me, and reminds me to stay off of my phone as much as possible hehe. We also share our locations on “Find My Friends” so if one of us hasn’t responded in a while, we know where the other person is (and that they are safe!).
4. Remember that you are more than your relationship
Make sure that you have a life outside of your relationship. You are your own person ya know, and your life isn’t defined by your relationship status. Have your own friends, and spend time with them! Have things you enjoy outside of your relationship! This will ensure that you aren’t just sitting around missing your partner, because that is NO fun let me tell you. It’s normal for them to be a big (maybe the biggest!) part of your life, but they shouldn’t be your entire life. You still have your own identity outside of your partner.
5. Find a hobby that you two can enjoy together
Jon and I were really good friends for about six months before we started dating. We both played RuneScape (a medieval MMORPG game) as kids, and that is something we bonded over immediately. As friends, we would constantly stay up late playing together and talking on the phone. To this day, RuneScape is still something that we enjoy to play together.
I hope these tips were helpful for your long-distance relationship! Remember that this is only based on my personal experience, and these things may not always work specifically for you. Once your find your own routine though, and you and your partner will get through it! Just think of how sweet it will be when you are no longer long-distance.
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